It hurts to feel
It hurts to watch my dreams
From the outside
My brain fragmented into shattered pieces
Memory and focus allude me

To put the words together

Heartbroken, seeking purpose
Why am I doing it all
Questions and more questions
Searching for solutions
Escaping when the pain gets too much again

Knowing the tools
Choosing to cope differently
Because after almost 4 decades
It all just gets to be too much

Crumbled pieces all around me
I forget how to put them back together
I forget where they go
How long will I let them keep getting shattered
Constantly putting the pieces back together
Before I say enough
And stop letting them get shattered to begin with

It’s time to live my dreams
Experience them from the inside
Stop letting fear steal them away
Stop giving others the power to steal them away

Memory and focus come back
When I kick sabotage away
The pieces find their way back together
With faith and hope and dedication

My dreams deserve me to take them seriously
I deserve to take me seriously
The time is now.