Like a slideshow my head indulges

Trying to pull the cord, kill the show

But this one won’t end

Over and over, screaming lying hurting

But you convinced me it was me

And I was overreacting

And I doubted me, my mind broke

I couldn’t trust myself, I still doubt myself

You aren’t the first

If you were, your virus coding wouldn’t have been assimilated so easily

Shorting every circuit in my mind

I believed you, I trusted you

I didn’t want to fail again

But I did, more spectacular than ever before

Because I wanted to believe you, I wanted to trust you

And you used that against me to get all you wanted, everything you wanted

I loved you, I loved them, but I didn’t love myself enough to listen to the flags

Alarm bells ringing all over

And I pressed snooze





Originally written april/20